New Sitcom Idea: �Tech Insurgency'

Don Tennant

Don't say you haven't been warned. There's an insurgency under way that will ultimately defeat the H-1B enemy, and those who are identified as siding with the enemy will suffer the retribution of the insurgents. Stop laughing. This isn't funny. I mean it. Stop it.

It all surfaced in reader commentary under my post, A reader who identified himself as 'Indian_H1-B' scoffed at unemployed IT workers who spend their time ranting in the blogosphere against offshore outsourcing and H-1B visa holders, particularly those from India:

I do get tickled by the reference to these efforts as "the insurgency." About the one thing I can vouch for is that there is such a preponderance of decency in the U.S. even in these harsh times that such bigotry would never be adopted by the mainstream.

Uh-oh. Them was fightin' words, partner. That comment riled the insurgents, who warn that the insurgency is very real, and very active. They even talk about where 'informants' and 'collaborators' fit into the insurrection. It's all quite spine-tingling.

You have the relatively calm insurgents like this woman, who wrote that her son is in a position at his company to screen resumes for his boss, and that she 'raised him well,' because he makes sure his boss never sees resumes from H-1B candidates. In her world, the insurgency is somewhat clandestine:

I wonder if folks like Indian_H-1B ever realize how much the insurgency relies on informants. I frequently encounter H-1Bs who imagine that the polite faces they see at work represent Americans' true opinions of them. Such folks often imagine that Americans respect and welcome them much more than they actually do. You have no idea how big the insurgency is.

Then you have the more wild-eyed insurgents, who want to take to the streets and physically confront those they see as the enemy:

The Insurgency will stage a raid soon in a local curry den and have a massive sit-in until all the slumdogs are gone. We will bring ICE and the media, and demand that all those guest workers get the f*ck out. We will bring unemployed American techies from all over the country and demand that the treasonous companies abide by OSHA and DOL rules, and we will file a massive amount of civil rights complaints with the DOJ. You pose as a progressive all the time, Don, so you can appreciate a good old dose of civil disobedience. Anyplace with 80-90% Indian IT workers will be targeted. As for collaborators like you -- THERE WILL BE RETRIBUTION.

All of this makes me think there's an idea here for a sitcom that's just screaming to be picked up by one of the networks. It could be called 'Tech Insurgency,' and it could star Michael Richards (Kramer from "Seinfeld") as the wacky xenophobe who huddles with his ruggedized laptop in his bunker full of canned goods and MREs, spewing hatespeak into the blogosphere; and Betty White as the undercover office tea lady who slips resumes from H-1B candidates into her apron pockets.

In the meantime, maybe this article, headlined� 'U.S. Government Opens Special 5,000-Acre Area Where Americans Can Go Blow Off Steam' from The Onion (a satirical news site, in case you're unfamiliar with it), holds the answer for the angry insurgents:

RATON, NM-Federal officials on Friday unveiled a new 5,000-acre national park where frustrated Americans can blow off some steam by smashing rows of televisions with a bat, screaming at the top of their lungs into a canyon, or playing tracks by Mot�rhead and the Angry Samoans at extreme volumes. "I'm as angry as anyone that we can't pass an energy bill or end Don't Ask, Don't Tell," said Sen. Tom Udall (D-NM), who christened the facility by igniting the contents of a trash barrel, which he then upended and kicked down a rocky slope. "But in the meantime, the least we can do is give people a place to go where they can just f*cking have at it." Opening day also included an unscheduled appearance by President Obama, who calmly entered the park, let loose a furious stream of undiluted profanity, punched several trees for 55 minutes, and then returned to Washington.

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